Wednesday, January 31, 2007

The Need To Be Authentic

au·then·tic·i·ty

–noun the quality of being authentic; genuineness. (Taken from Dictionary.Com)


"You see, authentic faith, faith that helps us face everyday living and gives us hope forever, is strengthened when we read God’s love letter to the human race: the Bible." (Taken from Better Living: Thoughts From Mark Daniels)


"He replied, "If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, Be uprooted and planted in the sea,' and it will obey you. (Luke 17:6)

My entire life I have led a Christian life because that was all I had been exposed to. My "Godly" thoughts and actions were merely motions that I went through because that was how I had been taught. It's sort of like brushing your teeth. It's one of those mindless things you do each day because everyone says that it's good for you. As a result, I eventually pushed away all that I had known and for nearly 5 years, I tried to do things my way. I didn't feel that my "faith" was truly my own. I felt it was my church's and my family's, but not mine.

Within the last year, I have come to a point in my life where I really felt that God was calling me back. I have felt a tug on my heart that just wouldn't be shaken. As a result, I am now looking to God to show me the way to live an
authentic Christian life. I want to depend on God and learn more about Him and live in a way that honors Him. I want it to be about God and me and I don't want it to be because someone else said I should or that it's good for me or even that it's the "right thing" to do.

Being a control freak and worry wart by nature, this has not been an easy journey and frankly, I have not always been very committed to it. I have a hard time giving up that control and relying on God to sustain me. The more I think about it though, the more I realize that it's time... Time to give up control...Time to make changes... Time to truly make my faith my own.

I have to be honest with you. I'm not sure where this journey is going to take me and I certainly have no idea how this should be done, but I do know that it is what I want and what God wants and because of that, I know my journey will be a successful one.

"To be poor in spirit means to be unable to face life, death, or eternity on own. We’re all poor in spirit. Happy people acknowledge it and let God fill their emptiness.
" (Taken from Better Living: Thoughts From Mark Daniels)

"My soul thirsts for God, for the living God." (Psalm 42:2a)

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Challenging Day

Today was definitely one of the most challenging days of late. Here's a little background. Recently I was approached by an independent insurance agent. She asked if I would be interested in a job. After going over all the particulars, I realized that the opportunity was one that I couldn't resist.

Benefits:
-I am able to take my son to work with me if necessary.
-I am able to set my own schedule so I can primarily work while my son is in preschool.
-Only 15 hours a week to start with the opportunity to increase those hours over time as I choose.
-The work itself interests me.
-My new boss is a family woman herself and understands my passion for family.

On to today, one of the requirements of going to work is getting several licenses. Today was my first 2 exams of several more to come. I was so very nervous and I thought for sure that I didn't pass, but amazingly and only with the help of God, I passed. I've been thanking God all day for helping me retain what I studied and keeping me calm during the exam.

A sweet note about my husband... He was praying today that God would help me pass. It's so amazing that I hear those words come from my husband who for so long wanted nothing to do with God and church. Life is amazing!!

So Starts My Blog

I am a happily married mommy of 1 and I'm on a journey to reinvention. I have lived my life in an uninspired mediocre way and I have chosen to change that. My goal is to become the wife and mother and woman that I know God has purposed me to be. I pray God will take this newly found passion and ignite it so that I may be considered worthy of the gifts I have been so greatly blessed with. Having passion for God and passion for family is the TRUE definition for living life to the fullest.

I have always wanted to have a blog where I could chronicle my many trials and triumphs, but I've never been motivated enough to keep up with it. I have now decided, however, that this just may be a great tool not only for others (that is, if anyone else choose to read this), but also for myself. So, here goes...